Olive,

Last month you decided to give your mama a birthday she would never forget. It all started with a temperature of 102. That alone is scary enough. But there’s more. You were so lethargic all you wanted to do was sleep. After giving you a dose of fever reducer we put you down for a nap. You slept for a really long time and woke up with the most peculiar cry. Your dad got to you before I did. He was holding you in his arms as I approached, it felt like time stood still as I began to take in what was going on. Your face was so dark red it looked purple, your little body seized up so tightly you were stiff as a board, and your little eyes rolled in back of your head. Then the words “oh my god she’s having a seizure” somehow escaped my mouth in a tone that was not hysterical. Daddy handed you over so he could call 911 and the seizure continued. I undressed you as I carried you outside to try and cool you down in the chill of a mid January evening. You almost immediately transformed in the brisk air. You still looked very much out of it, but you had at least regained your color and your muscles relaxed so much so that you felt limp in my arms. I was so scared. I kept thinking of the potential lasting effects of a seizure on your tiny little body. Thank god your dad is so calm and reasonable because his demeanor is what kept the roof over our head as I was ready to explode with emotion. The first responders came quickly. They were very optimistic and reassuring; telling us that this isn’t uncommon for some babies (5-10% of the population) and there typically aren’t any lasting effects from this type of seizure (febrile). They were comfortable with your condition and gave us the choice of riding with them to the emergency room or driving ourselves. Despite their reassurances, I needed to hear from a doctor and I worried about the long drive across town in late afternoon traffic on the Friday of a holiday weekend. What if it happens again during the drive over and she’s strapped in her car seat? So they kindly drove you and I to the ER. Your Dad followed behind us. You did well on the ride over and even dosed off for a bit. At the ER, the doctor walked in and said “look at all that snot!” I was relieved he was talking to you and not me as I had been blubbering for some time and knew it was probable. Adults with snotty faces aren’t as socially accepted as babies with snotty faces. But yes, he was right. Your poor little nose is so tender from all the tissue and boogie wipes and wash rags that have failed to keep you snot-less. The doctor confirmed that you had a virus which triggered the high fever that resulted in a fever or febrile seizure. He reiterated what the first responders had already shared and stressed that this doesn’t mean you are at risk for developing a seizure disorder. We learned how to manage a fever through the use of acetaminophen and ibuprofen on a four hour rotation and we now know that you are one of 5-10% of the population that needs extra attention when you run a temperature. Your dad and I have the fever thing covered, don’t worry about that. I need you to understand that birthdays are for parties and celebrations not trips to the ER, I know that has been the pattern given your birthday and my birthday, but that tradition ends right now. Understand?

Love you dearly!

Mama

Dear Olive,

Here we are at the zoo with the giraffs strolling around in the background. You love going to the zoo to people watch. Little people watch. There’s so many kids to see, they’re all excited and talkative and running around mimicking animal noises. Some day you’ll notice the exhibits too. And speaking of running around. My entries have been sparse as you have been picking up speed around the house lately. Gone are the days of lengthy blog posts. But right now you’re napping so I have time to share a quick observation. Austin City Limits was recently on in the background as we were feeding you a performance by Tom Waits began. You were so taken by his signature growl; you hung on every word, every note, every drag of his cigarette. It was amazing to see how long he held your attention. Stay away from those bad boys Olive. We’ll talk more about that later but for now I’ll just leave it at I like your taste in music.

It’s been so nice spending two entire weeks together! I can’t believe it’s time to head back to our every day routine shortly. But first we have to say farewell to 2011 and hello to a brand new year. 2011, what can I say? It’s been a blast! I wish it didn’t have to end. I hope that we will be lucky enough to enjoy as much joy and laughter in the coming year. That is my wish for you.

Love you,

Mama

Sweet little girl,

It’s your very first Christmas! You met Santa and thought he was an ok guy. No tears or distress at all. Before you came along, I was certain that the best thing about christmas was getting up late  and enjoying a mug of Baileys and coffee along with a batch of fudge, yes an entire batch of fudge. Don’t judge me. Now that you’re here, every day means so much. You’re sprouting teeth and hair. You’re pulling yourself up into a standing position and hobbling around with the help of stationary objects like your father, the crib, the coffee table, sometimes an unsuspecting cat. Your giggle, your 3 tooth smile, your warm pudgy belly, your tiny little toes, all beat any object or item that can be wrapped and placed under a tree or stuffed into a stocking. Thank you sweet little star for brightening our world and our hearts.

Merry Christmas!

Love,

mama

Dear Olive,

Your first Christmas is almost here already! It’s so hard to believe that you were just a peanut in my tummy last year at this time. You’re wearing a hat that your Grandma made for you in this picture. This morning before Dad left for work you said “Du du” to him and he nearly fell over. Your first word! We have an appointment to take family pics in a few weeks. At the rate you’re growing, you might just drive us there by that time.

Love you,

Mama

Back to the gory details. The vet feels it’s behavioral due to all the changes at home, ie: Baby Olive. He feels that Gary is anxious and depressed and wants us to do whatever we can to minimize his anxiety, sounds a lot like a postpartum depression convo I had not so long ago with my doctor. Came home from the vet with a diffuser that fits into a standard outlet and releases pheromones that are said to have a calming effect. By the evening Gary had come out from his hiding place and seemed a bit like his old self again. Amazing. With the holidays in full swing, maybe we can diffuse some Prozak and pump it through the air ducts because I’m afraid we’re in a sorry state of affairs if even the household pets have a prescription for antidepressants. Poor Gary. His sister Stashi (below) is like a little seal in the surf. She rides the waves as they come, perhaps because she was a homeless kitty before we adopted her. She’s fine with having a new addition to the family, as long as she has a warm place to sleep and food on the table, no prescriptions required. Atta girl Stashi! We can all learn from you.

Dear Olive,

We made it through your first fever and your first cold. Mama has decided she does not like either. Out of concern, a friend of mine shared that I really should keep a close eye as she witnessed a fever turn into a seizure when her daughter was just 4 months old….yikes! No thank you!

I love this picture of you! It captures your personality in my mind because although you are feeling quite poopy with a runny nose as evidenced here, you muster the energy to stick out your tongue and smile, as if to say “screw you virus!” That attitude will serve you well little love!

Keep smiling!

Love you,
Mama

It all started with a fortune-less cookie an unfortunate cookie…what do you call a fortune cookie that has no fortune? A cookie? Anyway, we ordered take out one night and I ended up with the cookie that had no fortune, naturally. Since then R.E.M broke up, Steve Jobs died, and the Simpsons are being eulogized in the headlines. The lesson is this: beware of the soul-less cookie who will never know his full potential and always feels empty inside. He’s a destructive little bugger!

Post-diaper change:

Dear Olive (and friends of Olive),

At nearly six months your latest talent is wrestling your way out of diaper changes. How can an itty bitty person wield so much strength? This weekend you tried one of the cereals that sponsors Sesame Street. The power of suggestion at work already commanding the dollar bills to levitate from our already lightweight pocketbook. But back to the cereal…you wore most of it on your face: not just mouth but nose, ear, etc. Your  hands also had a taste as did your long sleeve onesie. Yes I said “long sleeves!” It is finally starting to feel like fall around here. It’s so much fun bundeling you up! And speaking of Sesame Street…has the coolness factor increased or have I just not noticed all the great guest appearances before? Your favorite character is Elmo but I love being surprised to see familiar faces like these:

Adam Sandler

Feist

Brian Williams

Jimmy Fallon

Ben Stiller

and those are just the personalities I’ve noticed so far.

You are scooting your way around the house these days making me feel like this place will never be clean enough. Anybody else have babies on-the-move and kitties? I’m looking at the litter box and food/water situation through wary eyes recently.

That’s about it…I hope all is well with you lovely followers!

I don’t want this to turn into Square One: Bitch Fest. I want this to remain a lighthearted place made up primarily of notes and pictures for Olive. But every once in a while let me tell ya….

I rescued a little red wagon from the neighbor’s trash heap on garbage day several years ago. It’s a beat up eye sore with one wheel that has broken off completely so it’s forever cockeyed and kinda useless. But it looks like something that was so loved and cherished at one time; something that was shiny and bright and fun. I vowed to salvage what little life it had left and decorate it with some annuals. Then I remembered that I have a brown thumb and so it sits looking neglected and sad in the middle of our lawn.

I felt very much like the beat up version of that little cart today. Limping through the day before I completely crashed out well before the sun set. Sometimes I feel like work gets the best of me and poor Olive and hubby get the left overs. I need to work on changing that somehow…

If money were no object and I could be whoever I wanted to be I’d be a full time mama who occasionally jams on the ukelele with a band of pals, a part time jewelry designer, and I’d also love to teach a knitting class at my local yarn shop. Olive whatever you do I hope it fills you up to the very brim! I hope you wake up eager to get where you’re going most days. I can’t wait to see who you’ll become.

You will be 5 months old this week! Your first year with us is nearly half over. Hard to believe. I wish you would take your time but you seem to be in a hurry to learn new things and grow up quickly. This is one of your favorite toys. It makes you squeal, grin, and coo…otherwise known as the trifecta, a deadly combination of endearing qualities that commands your father and I to cater to your every whim. Yikes, we gotta get that in check soon! Look at your pudgy little arms and the dimples on your hands. You are plumping up quite nicely! You’re such a sweet little baby, among a million other adorable things, right now you like to gently put your chubby little hands on your daddy’s face when he is talking to you as you smile through the conversation. You also seem to be on the verge of crawling at the moment which has me feeling selfishly blue because I just know that you aren’t going to want to be held as much as soon as you become mobile. Keep growing little monkey…but take your time at it too. No rush.

Love you!

Mama